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5 min read

Cannabis Puns, Quotes, and Sayings

Published on
March 3, 2025

If there’s one thing we like to do here, it’s laugh.  Our Euphorium bestie Val compiled this epic list of weed puns that had me absolutely rolling.  Please enjoy responsibly.

1. You're unbe-weed-able

2. Just doob it

3. Stay High-drated

4. A friend with weed is a friend indeed

5. I don’t always roll a joint, but when I do, it’s my ankle

6. I always knew weed be friends

7. Let’s make like a hippy and blow this joint

8. You’re ganja have a good time

9. Welcome to the dank side

10. When they go low, we get high

11. Weed my lips

12. You can’t spell health care with THC

13. The name’s Bong, James Bong

14. Yes we CANnabis

15. Weed go well together

16. This should be a joint decision

17. You’re by best bud

18. 🎶 Now I know my CBD’s, next time smoke a bowl with meeee🎶

19. All I weed is you

20. It’s 420 somewhere

21. High miss you

22. You’re being high and mighty

23. I’m just a little high maintenance

24. Weed is my love language

25. I’m blunt because god rolled me that way

26. I’m on a seaweed diet;  I see weed and I smoke it

27.You toke my breath away

28. If weed puns are a sin, then I’ll see you inhale

29. When in doubt, smoke it out

30. Weed doesn’t make you cool.  It makes you high.

31. I told the doctor I had joint problems, and he told me to roll them tighter.

32. He who smokes weed on the toilet is high on pot

33. What do you call it when joint ash burns a hole in your shirt? A pot hole.

34. My stoner neighbors got divorced, but luckily they have joint custody.

35. How many stoners does it take to screw in a light bulb?  None, we got lighters.

36. Weed all do respect…

37. When in doubt, smoke it out.

38. Pass joints not judgements

39. A friend with weed is a friend indeed

40. Struggle is the enemy but weed is the remedy

41. Weed is good weed is fine, if you share yours then I’ll share mine.

42. I got 99 problems with 420 solutions